As I write this I feel my waistband expanding - my latest "treat" is doing a very good job of covering up any abdominals I might have been working hard at exposing lately. Golden Grahams. (I blame Sheena, she told me I deserved a little treat from Target when I was there the other night.) Golden Grahams are so good and sooo sugary a pregnant woman could consume a bowl full instead of the syrupy "drink" they give you for a glucose tolerance test. Yes, this "healthy" cereal that is a "whole grain" vitamin-fortified cereal is THAT sugary. In fact, (of course I did the math) consuming 3 servings of Golden Grahams dry (that would be 2.25 cups, not a lot really) yields nearly as much sugar as one can of Coke or Mountain Dew. Gross. For the same amount of sugar you can have 33 cups of Cheerios. I did the math.
So mentally I am struggling - if you haven't picked up on that yet. But, the real reason other than eating Golden Grahams is that I am "sick" AGAIN. I was put on an antibiotic on the 3rd of March for a sinus infection which seemed to be effective at reducing the number of times I needed to blow my nose, the amount of drainage down my throat, and the pain that hung out across my nose and forehead. I was also able to resume my training schedule.
Wait...look at the calendar...that means I went two weeks without major problems? 2 weeks? Well, shit, it must be time to having something else go haywire....enter a new issue.
So last week Wednesday night and into Thursday and Friday I was feeling mildly nauseous. I chalked it up to too much PB Wednesday night and called it a stupid mistake. My workouts were going fine and in fact I felt better during the workouts than I did after. My neck had been a bit stiff, but I figured it was due to one of my 2011 goals of 100+ sit-ups/day and perhaps due in part to my super 3700 yd pool workout on Friday night. I was thoroughly convincing myself that it wasn't "a touch of the flu." Flu? Not on my agenda. Not my style. I had 5 workouts to do Friday (2), Saturday (1) and Sunday (2) and I would reach my weekly goal of 11h45m of total time. I was so pumped. The super pool workout was #2 for Friday.
Saturday morning (workout #3) I got up feeling less than great, and shortened my planned workout by 15 minutes mostly due to running short on time for my big day out with friends and partly due to not feeling super. I threw in the white flag while biking and running that morning. At that point I arrived at the concept that this level of training would REQUIRE me to get more than 7-8 hours of sleep/night. Okay, okay, I get it. I will do that. Now...if I could only sleep at night...but, that's not the point here....
I finished my workout, drove home, ate, stripped down for a shower and noticed that I had some sort of red rash on my torso - just the front of me. I figured it was due to my workout shirt/sweat. I showered and made my way down to the MOA to have lunch with my BFF, her husband B and her brand new baby O! Ate a ton (like my appetite ever goes away) and then made my way back up to MG for dinner (like 2 hours later, ugh) with K and A. I was cranky and I apologized to them for my crankiness, but I figured I was just tired and full and sort of irritated with the conversations we were having. We were rushed too - which never helps conversations with good friends. Drove home and CRASHED. Planned on sleeping in...
Woke up Sunday morning with what looked like a sunburn all over my face, my chest, parts of my arms, my hips and upper legs and my face was swollen. I looked sunburnt and I felt like it. Hot. Literally and physically. PANIC. Being someone that normally does not eat out much, let alone two meals in one day, I was trying to blame the swelling on all the sodium I had consumed on Saturday. I called my mom again. (I called her Saturday night before I crashed to ask about the rash - she thought it could be due to the antibiotics. I had one dose left which I took before I crashed.) As I was talking to her I found the Rx sheet that came with the antibiotic and read it to her - I had about 5 of the "CONTACT YOUR DOCTOR IMMEDIATELY IF YOU EXPERIENCE ANY OF THESE SYMPTOMS." So, naturally, PANIC time. I went to the ER since an urgent care facility didn't open up for another 90 minutes. My BP was 147/86 holy crap! Much to the amusement and curiosity of the 2 nurses and 1 doctor that saw me, I did not have a fever, but I sure felt like it and looked like it. My neck pain was getting worse, my throat was sore, I felt nauseous, and so tired. I felt like I could have just passed out right on the green ER bed sheets. After a lot of questioning I left with the following diagnosis. An allergic reaction to the Bactrim (yes, I now have my first official allergy) with possible meningitis. WHAT!?!?!? The deadly virus!?!??!?! PANIC. The stiff neck is the #1 symptom of the meningitis along with a fever and sensitivity to light. I was told to take a double dose of Benadryl along with ibuprofen, monitor my symptoms and come back to the ER if any of the symptoms worsened. Monitor my symptoms while passed out from the Benadryl? Ok, sure. I took my temperature about once/hour for the rest of the day. No fever. I made sure I could touch my chin to my chest about once/15 minutes. No problem there; I just look goofy doing that. I did take a little nap around 3pm which was sandwiched between watching....14 episodes of Friends (Season 5). Yes, 14 episodes on Sunday. That is more TV than I have watched in the last 3 weeks combined.
I woke up feeling a lot better on Monday, but the rash was spreading down my legs and arms. Fortunately my face was not as red - so I took a little field trip to BN in the late afternoon to read some magazines and get out of my crazy apt. That helped a lot. My neck pain was practically gone and the nausea was gone too as far as I could tell. I slept another 9-10 hours last night and woke up with no neck pain (yay), no throat pain (yay) and itching like a FREAK. This itching woke me up several times during the night (damn it), but thank you to Benadryl that helped with it. I was so miserable from the itchy I don't care how much Benadryl I had to take. I thought I would shower and straighten my hair to help me feel better about myself as I am starting to feel like a fatty from not working out the last two days. WRONG idea. I could barely stand up to straighten my hair - it literally exhausted me. All day today I have had zero energy. I can barely walk up the stairs. The elevator is for wimps - and I'm not a wimp. You know how much I HATE being contained inside, let alone in this tiny stupid apt, when the sun is coming out, and all I want to do is go for a little workout, and I can't. wow. Just writing this I am struggling to keep my eyes open.
I am looking at what I can do to revise my workout schedule - as I wasn't able to finish last week's plan and this week is already shot. At this point I am not sure what I will be able to do tomorrow. Just getting out the door for my 10:00 meeting (rescheduled from Monday) sounds like a chore.
I admit - I am down. But, I am NOT out. I look at my race calendar and am so excited about it, but again, just thinking about a race exhausts me let alone worrying my workout clothes don't fit me anymore. I worry about being "ready." I get sad about it. Again, I was doing so well again for two weeks only to meet another bump in the road. I need to recognize how I could have prevented this past 6 weeks - particularly the past 4 days - from happening. I'm sure some of it was out of my control, but what could I have controlled? I just don't know...
Yes, I am down. I am finally admitting defeat. I am throwing in the towel - I need more rest - I get it. I get it. I will rest more. I will make a short nap part of as many days as my schedule will allow. I used to be more resilient. I also used to be 27. I'm 32. I'm not out. I am not out.
But, I am going to take two more Benadryl and go back to bed.
No comments:
Post a Comment